Tidal Wave

"You have no idea what is coming your way!" That was the single phrase that made my bucket overflow.

It was March 12th, and I was again consuming more about the Coronavirus. We are in a time where information about the virus is everywhere, and it's hard to avoid. Over time all this consumption became like drops of informational water in my mental bucket.

Before March 12th, my bucket absorbed the drops of information relatively well. Still, without realizing it, my bucket was teetering on overflowing. After reading a Facebook story from a woman living in Milan who said in her post, "You have no idea what is coming your way!" my bucket tipped over. A wave of worry, fear, and anxiety came pouring out.

I kept picturing a tidal wave of screaming-panicked people coming at me, and I had nowhere to run, hide, or find safety. I started to feel very anxious and worried. I cried because my bucket had overflowed.

I needed to get out and get away. 

I grabbed my snowboarding gear and headed as fast as possible to my car. I sped to the mountain, most of the way, driving 90 miles an hour. 
Once there, I popped in my earbuds and cranked up the music to help drown out my thoughts. As I rode the chairlift, I finally started to breathe. When I came to the top of the mountain, it was like time had stopped: The sun was shining, the mountains awe-inspiring; snow sparkled in the sun, and I let myself breathe and exhale and just-be-in-the-moment. I rode for an hour non-stop. The tidal wave of panic with each run got smaller until it was just a ripple.

Since March 12th, I have had moments where I notice my bucket filling back up, at which time I stop and pour it out, so it doesn't overflow. I pour it out by exercising at home, walking in my neighborhood, doing yard work, coaching clients, turning off the news, and giving extra kisses and snuggles to my dog Penny.

I am learning that during this time: I have control. I control what I watch and read and step away when it's too much. When I feel my bucket filling up, I am allowed to turn off the t.v. or social media. 

I have never been thru this before. None of us have. I am allowing myself to be Certain of the Uncertainty. And that's ok.

Karen Tran, CPCC - Seattle Life Coach
www.karentrancoaching.com